I miss these happy faces...

The past couple of days have been too much for my mommy heart to handle and probably two of the scariest most hardest days of motherhood I have ever faced. I am physically and emotionally exhausted.

Cameron and Haley both have drippy noses, little coughs, and sunken eyes and Nick has managed to catch a bug as well. Every time I think they are getting better, their fevers seem to come back. I was up all night with Cameron Saturday and am trying to push through today with the help of an energy drink that tastes like chalk.

There have been plenty of baby tears and it has taken everything I have not to let out mommy tears. Please say a little prayer for us <3

a girl can dream...

Yesterday, I took a few (read: 84) maternity photos for my best friend Amy. She is a little over 28 weeks right now and her little bun is perfect and round. It still has a lot of growing to do before baby Gracen makes her grand debut in February, but we had to sneak in some pictures anyway. I imagine Gracen to be cute and sassy just like her momma, and fingers-crossed, to have a head full of red hair just like the folks on her daddy's side.

I am obviously not a professional- I have the cheapest camera nick and I could find after Haley took our old one for the ride of it's life, but I also know that having a good camera doesn't gaurantee a good picture... and that was the bit of hope I ran with for this shoot.

  

  





  

  


  

  

I learned a lot of valuable lessons this go around. To be sure to practice the rule of thirds, to never put your subject against a "black" background if she is wearing black, to get more belly than more skin in close up pictures (oooh, I was extra sloppy there), to research more poses so you don't end up with 40 of your subject looking down at her belly (hah), and the most important rule of all- to always pretend to look like you know what you're doing!

Just little things like that are all a part of the learning process and I am grateful for such an experience to figure things out and for some bonding time with my friend. I hope she treasures these with all her heart and I hope Gracen will too.

I am now even MORE determined to save up for my DSLR and make my dreams of becoming a photographer come true. I need a job that is fufilling to me and that allows me to connect with other people in our community. I hope to the tips of my toes that more opportunities arise.

Friends, if you don't see me all winter, just know that I am off rummaging under other people's couches for pennies, nickles and dimes... and hopefully an occasional quarter!

happy things on a rainy day...

  

+ waking up to a clean house, a complete suprise from my sweet husband <3
+ hot cocoa and goldfish graham crackers
+ Cameron sitting up on her own
+ planning a seperate little thanksgiving celebration for just the 4 of us
+ an inbox overflowing with etsy orders (aka a trip the grocery store, amen!)
+ Haley learning the words to "Rain, rain, go away..." and singing it with me
+ a lazy dog sitting at my feet and keeping them warm
+ planning for my best friend Amy's maternity photo session
+ my two babies playing contently together while mama gets her work done

What are you smiling about today?

Hiking at the Knob...

Sunday morning was ranked up there with the best of them, even though I toted around a slight hangover from the night before. After a super, greasy, super-greasy down home breakfast from Tex's complete with the best homefries in the world we ventured to Stuart's Knob for a little hiking, hand holding, calorie burning, and fairystone hunting with Chris and Lacey.

The Legend of the Fairy Stone: Many hundreds of years before Chief Powhatan’s reign, fairies were dancing around a spring of water, playing with naiads and wood nymphs, when an elfin messenger arrived from a city far away. He brought news of the death of Christ. When these creatures of the forest heard the story of the crucifixion, they wept. As their tears fell upon the earth, they crystallized to form beautiful crosses.

Although we had no luck finding any precious cross shaped stones... it was a decent workout, cotton candy bubble gum was chewed, and bob marley was sung so I can't complain. Plus, how can you not have fun when engrossing yourself in such a tale! I truly cannot wait until Haley and Cameron are a bit older and we can take them fairystone hunting. There's always an extra bit of magic in the air when kids are involved.

Perhaps my favorite part of the entire trip was enjoying the leaves. I find them so captivating at this time of year. Though most of them have fallen by this point, the random clusters of them we spotted every now and again were recieved like little gifts from the earth. Aren't their tiny lives one of nature's sweet ironies? To beam so brightly and be so full of color right before they fall to the ground...









I believe a mandatory trip is due the day after thanksgiving! ;)

A Fresh Start...

I started a blog a couple years ago (though the majority of it has now been made private) to note the happy little things that each day brings: the joy of taking the girls on a wagon ride and feeling the sun hit our skin, the randomness of a successful attempt at cooking cause Lord knows I have been cursed by the baking gods for all eternity, the satisfaction that comes with completing a project for my little ones, a silly night out with my girlfriends lacking all sense and class but not seeming to care... the things that make me breathe easy, the things that make my heart beat a little faster, the things that I want to smile back on years from here...

I neglected it somewhere after the birth of my second child as I needed to focus on motherhood, my marriage, and my household. I needed to get real with myself. I have never considered myself a bad mother, but I do have to admit that Nick and I were kinda "thrown" into the whole process of parenting a little earlier than we expected and I am still very much learning the ropes and figuring out my parenting style. Heck, I'm still trying to figure out marriage.

This time around, I want my blog to be a bit more uncensored and to include the struggles that are molding us, humbling us, and bringing us closer together along with the joys and hardships of finding our rhythm, establishing traditions, and making our house a home.

The truth of it all is that there are weeks where we survive off ramen noodles and then there are weeks when we eat like kings... there are spurts where we make love every night and there are weeks when I'd rather stick my face in one of Cameron's diapers then even think about having sex... there are days when I question why Nick and I jumped into marriage and then there are days when I remember how easy it was to say "I do!" and how I knew that things would fall into place, just like they always seem to....

As the sweet saying goes,

"Life ain't always beautiful, but it's a beautiful ride"

I want to embrace it all.

<3